The Statistics 2005 - 2006
Saturday Team
|
 |
| LEAGUE
TABLE |
|
|
| * adjustment made |
|
|
|
| PLAYER SEASON TOTALS |
| PLAYER |
|
Appearances |
|
Bench |
|
Goals |
|
Overall
Goals |
|
Started |
|
Blake, Rob |
|
1 |
|
1 |
|
|
|
|
|
1 |
|
Brannigan, Martin |
|
1 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
1 |
|
Brown, Darren |
|
4 |
|
5 |
|
|
|
|
|
4 |
|
Cope, Shaun |
|
11 |
|
5 |
|
8 |
|
8 |
|
11 |
|
Cope, Wayne |
|
15 |
|
|
|
6 |
|
6 |
|
15 |
|
Cox, Kevin |
|
15 |
|
1 |
|
1 |
|
1 |
|
15 |
|
Lumsden, Tony |
|
14 |
|
|
|
3 |
|
3 |
|
14 |
|
Macklin, Ian |
|
1 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
1 |
|
Macklin, Peter |
|
2 |
|
1 |
|
|
|
|
|
2 |
|
Mahoney, Michael |
|
6 |
|
3 |
|
|
|
|
|
6 |
|
Moore, Adrian |
|
9 |
|
|
|
1 |
|
1 |
|
9 |
|
Moss, Adam |
|
11 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
|
Oram, Chris |
|
12 |
|
2 |
|
2 |
|
2 |
|
12 |
|
Osmond, Chris |
|
13 |
|
|
|
3 |
|
3 |
|
13 |
|
Percy, Neil |
|
6 |
|
7 |
|
|
|
|
|
6 |
|
Pettitt, Shaun |
|
10 |
|
1 |
|
3 |
|
3 |
|
10 |
|
Rigler, Dave |
|
9 |
|
4 |
|
1 |
|
1 |
|
9 |
|
Rogerson, Adam |
|
|
|
2 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Rogerson, Dean |
|
16 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
16 |
|
Spivey, Darren |
|
15 |
|
|
|
1 |
|
1 |
|
15 |
|
Vincent, Gareth |
|
12 |
|
|
|
2 |
|
2 |
|
12 |
|
Walker, Michael |
|
|
|
1 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
White, Nick |
|
|
|
2 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
White, Rob |
|
4 |
|
10 |
|
1 |
|
1 |
|
4 |
|
|
|
| TEAM SEASON TOTALS |
| Goals |
|
Overall
Goals |
| 32 |
|
|
|
| |
|
|
| 32 |
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sunday
DORSET SUNDAY LEAGUE DIVISION TWO TABLE
| PLAYER SEASON TOTALS |
| PLAYER |
|
Appearances |
|
Bench |
|
Goals |
|
Overall
Goals |
|
Started |
|
Bennett, Thomas |
|
8 |
|
3 |
|
9 |
|
9 |
|
8 |
|
Cleall, John |
|
3 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
3 |
|
Cope, Shaun |
|
17 |
|
2 |
|
18 |
|
18 |
|
17 |
|
Cope, Wayne |
|
5 |
|
1 |
|
2 |
|
2 |
|
5 |
|
Cox, Kevin |
|
13 |
|
3 |
|
4 |
|
4 |
|
13 |
|
Curtis, Kevin |
|
|
|
7 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Dyke, Carl |
|
16 |
|
5 |
|
|
|
|
|
16 |
|
Gale, Tristan |
|
13 |
|
3 |
|
|
|
|
|
13 |
|
Lippitt, Darren |
|
|
|
2 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Lumsden, Tony |
|
4 |
|
|
|
1 |
|
1 |
|
4 |
|
Macklin, Ian |
|
3 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
3 |
|
Macklin, Peter |
|
13 |
|
1 |
|
6 |
|
6 |
|
13 |
|
Mahoney, Mick |
|
15 |
|
|
|
5 |
|
5 |
|
15 |
|
Moorse, Alex |
|
1 |
|
1 |
|
|
|
|
|
1 |
|
Moss, Adam |
|
4 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
4 |
|
Owers, Brendan |
|
18 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
18 |
|
Percy, Neil |
|
18 |
|
|
|
1 |
|
1 |
|
18 |
|
Pettitt, Ryan |
|
11 |
|
1 |
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
|
Pettitt, Shaun |
|
5 |
|
|
|
1 |
|
1 |
|
5 |
|
Portt, Kevin |
|
|
|
3 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Rogerson, Adam |
|
8 |
|
10 |
|
1 |
|
1 |
|
8 |
|
Rogerson, Dean |
|
20 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
20 |
|
Spivey, Darren |
|
1 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
1 |
|
Walker, Michael |
|
17 |
|
1 |
|
4 |
|
4 |
|
17 |
|
White, Nick |
|
17 |
|
|
|
2 |
|
2 |
|
17 |
|
|
|
| TEAM SEASON TOTALS |
| Goals |
|
Overall
Goals |
| 54 |
|
|
|
| |
|
|
| 54 |
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
Match
reports for BRFC 2005 -2006 season
April / May 2006
Saturdays
Bere Regis 2: Broadmayne 4
Scorers: Gingealdinho, Darrenaldo
Having already wrapped up fifth spot, Sven White decided to have a bit
of fun with the line up and gave a chance to two unknowns in the Theo
Walcott mould: Gingealdinho and Darrenaldo. Despite no previous league
experience in the forward line (but plenty at the back!) this untried
pairing were soon terrorising the Broadmayne defence. There is nothing
that terrifies a defence more than pace and these boys were soon
showing the kind of speed that Pete Doherty would be proud of. The
first opportunity fell to Gingealdinho when head waiter Kev Cox
outpaced the defence, drew the keeper and literally laid it on a plate.
Whilst the ‘GingerPounder’ may have the pace of
Michael
Owen he showed us the finishing of Michael Mouse as, with the goal at
his mercy, he skewed his shot wide. Thankfully, Darrenaldo was on the
top of his game soon after as he crunched into a 60:30 challenge with
the keeper and the ball fell to his striking (or so the girls say!)
partner. Always the gentleman, he waited for the defenders to get back
before chipping the ball over their heads and into the goal to take the
lead. But this game was not all about this legendary front line. At the
back, the pairing of White and Vincent had some of us older players
reminiscing about the defensive greats, Bobby Moore and ‘Big
Ron’ Atkinson. I was certainly thinking Moore-Ron when I was
watching them play. However, one of the turning points was the arrival
of Dean Rogerson in goal to replace the Broadmayne player, who was
doing an excellent job. Dean seemed more concerned with saving his
hands for cricket in the afternoon and was showing all the aggression
of a French chicken! Before you knew it, a looping header just eluded
him and it was 1-1.
The second turning point came when one half of the dynamic duo had to
leave to be an usher in the afternoon (only in Dorset football!), to be
replaced by a Broadmayne forward whose heart was never really in it.
Broadmayne were showing a bit more hunger than Bere, except for Kevin
Cox who has more hunger than the whole Ethiopian nation, and so it was
no surprise when they opened up a two goal lead. The Copes finally
decided to leave the safe haven of the touchline to come on for the
last twenty minutes and Shaun Cope was soon terrorising the defence,
his own that is as he slotted in at the back but continued his
repertoire of flicks and tricks. When 3-1 became 4-1 you would have
thought it was all over, but the best was yet to come.
‘Darrenaldo’ Spivey, playing in what could well be
his last
game now he has hit the big four ‘O’, spotted the
near post
ball before Wayne had even thought of it. In true Gianfranco Zola style
he stepped over the ball and back heeled it past a bemused keeper, to
the amusement of all his team mates. Form is temporary, class is
permanent…..and this boy has had more class in his time than
Mr.
Chips!
As the final whistle went and the players ambled off to the bar, the
manager was left to mull over a season that saw Bere hit the heights in
their Cup win over Lyme Regis; plumb the depths in defeat against
Lytchett and Purbeck; and come within touching distance of that elusive
Cup final!! Whilst they couldn’t blame food poisoning, I
wonder
if alcohol poisoning could be used to get that semi final
replayed…….
Sundays
Bere Regis 3: Bryanston 1
Scorers: T Lumsden, W Cope, P Macklin
Purbeck AFC 5: Bere Regis 0
Rising Sun 15: Bere Regis 0
Whoever arranged the last two games against the two teams vying for the
Championship must have had it in for Bere. Having wrapped up eighth
spot against Bryanston in fine style there was little incentive for
players to turn up and so the usual suspects didn’t, leaving
Adam
with just ten players against a Rising Sun team who had to score at
least twelve goals to be in with a chance of the league, the rest is
history…..
Leaving these last two games aside, Adam can look back on a job well
done this season. Despite being relegated last season, he has
galvanised a team spirit amongst the youngsters (probably gin!) and
brought them together (at Clouds Hill mostly) to produce a very capable
little side.
With a bit of dabbling in the transfer market (otherwise known as
asking round in pubs and clubs) next season may be something to
savour……
March / April 2006
Saturdays
Kangaroos 1: Bere Regis 2
Scorers: G Vincent, own goal
With Sven Goran White on his travels in Spain, it was down to Tord Spiv
to take over the reins again. With an injury list longer than
Bungy’s arm and playing the team above them in the league,
things
did not look good. However, using persuasive techniques that even Alan
Sugar would be impressed with Tord managed to gather a squad scratchier
than a dog in a flea circus. The fact that Bere were also returning to
the scene of their Cup humiliation the week before only added to the
sense of foreboding.
However, learning the lessons of the previous week, Tord persuaded
Vinny to play uphill and against the wind in the first half and the
tactics paid off. With the midfield and defence working their socks off
and Percy playing a blinder in goal Bere managed to keep it goalless
until half time and the game was in the bag. One particular save from
young Percy gave him such a smack in the ear that he could hardly hear,
especially when asked for his match fees…..!
So all Bere had to do was turn up for the second half and the game was
all theirs, how wrong could you be!! Within minutes of the restart,
Kangaroos had worked an opening and taken the lead. After scoring, they
continued to play with pace and precision and worked several openings
that were either thwarted by our inspired keeper, or simply missed
through poor finishing. However, Bere weathered this storm and soon
started to put together their own little rain cloud, culminating in a
goalmouth scramble that bounced off a Kangaroo (as it would!) and went
in. Confidence now oozed through the team and when Mike
Walker’s
pace created a free kick opportunity, Vinny stepped up to the plate.
The precision free kick was a joy to behold as it flew in off the
inside of the far post with the keeper helpless. Unrestrained joy led
to more male hugging than a George Michael video. Bere clung on for yet
another memorable victory and an assured fifth spot in the league, just
missing out on Europe yet again…unlike their manager!!
Sundays
Bere Regis 3: AC Electrical 2
Scorers: P Macklin, S Cope, W Cope
Wallisdown Sports 4: Bere Regis 0
Bere Regis 3: Morden 5
Scorers: T Lumsden, W Cope, S Cope
Just the one win in the month was disappointing for a manager that now
expects more than Oliver himself. Even that win was much closer than it
needed to be in a game where Bere edged their way back from 2-1 down
against AC Electrical, who appeared to derive their name from the fact
that they were truly shocking! An instantly forgettable game against
Wallisdown was followed by a game that should only be remembered for a
legendary goalkeeping performance from Bere’s new keeper for
the
day. You could say it was a truly Titanic effort, as in the ocean liner
not the Greek legends! With worse handling than a second hand Lada we
can only assume that he was having a day as off as the contents of a
student’s fridge. It is a shame that Bere’s last
home game
should end in such a way but this did not stop the players retiring to
the bar to celebrate a pretty decent season and catch the Grand Prix on
TV…the only thing the keeper caught all day!!
Match Reports February - March 2006
Saturdays
It is a shame that the only bad result this month was the one that
mattered most!
Wareham Rangers 2: Bere Regis 2
Scorers: W Cope, C Oram
Wareham Rangers fielded a few of their combination players, yet still
Bere showed that they are at home in such illustrious company. Despite
going a goal down when the ball bounced over Ginge’s head
(Losing
height as well as weight!), Wayne tucked a near post cross neatly away
to keep Bere level at half time. Disaster struck soon after the break
when a handball decision against Spivey gave Wareham a penalty more
dubious than a nursery school run by Gary Glitter. Bere were not
downhearted though and it was Wayne Cope, having tormented the Wareham
defence all day, who set off on a run past several defenders then teed
up the ball for Chris Oram, cooler than an arctic cucumber, who passed
the ball into the net for the equaliser and a well deserved point,
followed by an even more well deserved pint!
AFC Hurst 1: Bere Regis 5
Scorers: R White, D Rigler, W Cope, S Cope (2)
On a day windier than a ‘sprout and baked bean’
eating competition Bere
indulged in a spot of strolling in the park as they took all the points
in a game that was not for the purists amongst you. There was more
chance of Bungy completing a crossword than Bere completing a pass, yet
still they were 3-1 up thanks to that midfield dynamo Dave
‘It’s Dave’
Rigler. It was his corner that set up Rob’s headed goal and
his shot
that fairly burst the net for a second. A third from Wayne killed off
the game, but that didn’t stop Hurst trying to get back in
the game,
ably assisted by a neat piece of misjudgement from Dean in goal,
flapping like an excitable seal at a corner! It was only when Bungy and
Shaun were added to the fray that Bere found their scoring touch again.
Two shuddering tackles from Bungy caught Hurst at sixes and sevens and
Shaun was on hand to complete a double quick double.
Bere Regis 2: Kangaroos 1
Scorers: K Cox, W Cope
Despite Kangaroos being above Bere, they were caught on the hop (I have
been waiting all season to use that!!) by a Bere side playing for
places in the semi final. Spivey gave away his now traditional penalty
to let Kangaroos take the lead, but Bere’s midfield were in
the mood
today, no more so than Kev ‘The Wolverine’ Cox who
chased the ball
down, won possession and unleashed a shot that deflected into the net.
The bounce was now in Bere’s step as they tore into the
Kangaroos and
won the game thanks to a superbly timed flick from Ady Moore and a
sublime finish from Wayne Cope. The down side was an injury to Ginge
that may put him out of the semis, who’d be a
manager….
Dorchester YMCA 5: Bere Regis 1 (Cup Semi Final)
Scorer: A Moss
If
I were Jose, I would be blaming injuries, the referee, the pitch,
Arsene Wenger and God. But I’m not and this was simply a case
of our
luck finally running out. In an ideal world Ginge would have lasted for
more than 15 minutes (on and off the pitch!); Squint’s inch
perfect lob
would not have been cleared off the line; YMCA’s forward
would have
been marginally offside for their first goal rather than marginally
onside; Coxy would have buried the sitter he skewed wide; and Bere
would have held on for a plucky 1-0 win. Unfortunately, we live in the
real world. A world where several great chances are missed;
Bere’s
defenders are easily outpaced; YMCA’s forwards find the
corners with
every shot; and Spivey decides to concuss himself in the last minute
and miss out on the fun and frolics of a night out in Dorchester with
the lads! If life is like a box of chocolates, why do we always end up
with the nougatty one!!
Sundays
Bere Regis 3: Broadstone Cons 2
Scorers: A Rogerson, K Cox, M Mahoney
Let us remember the games where Bere come back from 2-1 down in a
comeback that would have Rocky scratching his head in disbelief. Let us
forget the games where hangovers mean that the game is started with
only ten men. Let us remember a peach of a goal from Adam Rogerson.
Bere Regis 3: Horse and Groom 8
Scorers: M Walker (2); S Cope
Let
us forget the games that go pear shaped. Let us remember Kevin Cox
running 40 yards to harry the defender into a mistake then finish at
the keeper’s near post. Let us forget a defence about as safe
as £50m
in the hands of Securitas. Let us remember Mick Mahoney’s
screamer to
win the game in the last minute….
Saturdays January/February
Bere Regis 0: Lytchett RT 1
Bere Regis 1: Easton Utd 2
Scorer: W Cope
A month of mixed fortunes for the Regis as a good start was spoiled by
a truly awful final result against Easton. The main problem is that,
against the league leaders like Purbeck and Lytchett, the players raise
their game. Against the likes of Cranborne and Easton they look as
motivated as a sloth in a massage parlour.
Purbeck Panthers 1: Bere Regis 1
Scorers: C Osmond
Against Purbeck, the most difficult part for players like Coxxy was
getting out of the changing rooms, as he skated round the village hall
on his studs like he was auditioning for Dancing on Ice. Once on the
pitch Bere were more than a match for their league leading opponents
and took a deserved lead when Ginge ‘The goal
machine’
Osmond stumbled one into the net from a corner. As the second half
progressed Bere looked on course for victory and even squandered a
couple of decent chances, which they were left to rue when Purbeck
equalised late on with a floated cross that curled agonisingly past
Dean. Against Lytchett, it was a similar story. Despite having a
spanking of Tory politician proportions against them earlier in the
season, Bere’s scratch side took the game to them and
deserved at
least a point. The only black spot in an otherwise bright performance
was a misplaced pass from young Mr Moore that went straight to a
Lytchett player who, with a clear run on goal, scored the winner. He
must have missed out on his Sanatogen that morning!
Bere Regis 5: Cranborne Res 1
Scorers: D Spivey, C Osmond, C Oram, S Cope, A Moore
A poor performance against Cranborne still finished with a hatful of
goals from a team so woeful in defence even Spivey scored against them!
Against a defence that would make Stonehenge seem positively agile,
Spivey ghosted in at the back from a corner and volleyed a cracker that
almost burst the net, his first competitive goal for three seasons.
Despite being pegged back by a smart finish from Cranborne’s
lively forwards, Ginge soon restored their lead from a corner again and
then split the defence for Oram to score on his birthday (21 again!).
the second half was much the same as Bere hardly moved out of gear to
score another couple and finish the game off. Shaun Cope powered a
drive past the keeper, whilst Bungy threaded an exquisite pass through
for Adrian Moore to finish with aplomb. An even poorer performance
against Easton gave Bere their worst defeat of the season (so far!).
Despite being hammered by a few lofty teams, this was much worse
because it was a game Bere should have won by a country mile. Two
defensive mistakes gifted Easton their goals. Meanwhile, in front of
goal Bere were finishing as well as Devon Loch! Despite around 6,350
corners Bere’s only goal came from a Wayne Cope penalty when
Squint was felled in the box (painful!). A game to forget and a season
that could still end in disaster if Bere do not pull their socks up!
Sundays
January/February
Dumpton Academicals 5: Bere Regis 0
Dumped on by Dumpton!!
Not much more to say really, except that the new team spirit started to
falter, which is one thing these youngsters cannot afford to lose.
Injuries, weather and birthday parties have conspired to make this the
only game of the month but, hopefully, the new Bere Regis will return
in their next match.
Boxing Day Extravaganza
Old
Gits 3: Young Whippersnappers 2
(12A: Contains violence, strong language, sex references,
horror and partial nudity)
Never
before has a match report needed a classification, but some of this
game was certainly not fit for our younger readers and, obviously, I
blame the referee. Mark Gale displayed as much control as an
incontinent on a pogo stick and the players simply took advantage. The
poor Old Gits, with only a three man advantage this year, were out of
their depth for much of the first half and outplayed by the Young
Whippersnappers. A combination of hangover and early morning whisky
meant that tackles on both sides were a tad late (even without either
of the Mosses playing!) yet remained unpunished, which merely
encouraged more of the same. Horror tackles on either side saw Simon
Scott’s OG debut marred by a duck egg lump on his shin; Adey
Moore
chipping a bone on his foot (a bit faster and he might have got out of
the way!); and Al Moorse revisiting old wounds. Even more horrific to
watch was Lamby’s turn of pace as, on one occasion, he was
just pipped
to a through ball by a passing snail. There was also the frightening
sight of our own WWE celebrity. Move over ‘The
Rock’ and make way for
Pip ‘The Boulder’ Evans, scorning the
‘Clothes Line’ for ‘The Kitchen
Sink’, as everything went into demolishing one poor
youngster. To add
insult to all these injuries, Mark then awarded a penalty to the
youngsters, breaking a tradition that has lasted well over a hundred
years. Thankfully, the Old Gits had Lyndon ‘The
Pussy’ White (sorry,
‘The Cat’, please edit!) in goal, a sight to strike
terror into all
players hearts, especially the Old Gits. As Pete Macklin (Bere Sunday
side’s leading scorer last season) stepped up you could
almost hear the
tension, or it might just have been Lyndon’s failing
ligaments
creaking! Yet, miracles are standard fayre at Christmas and, through
some ancient reflex, he stuck out one arthritic leg to save the Old
Gits. Okay, so the youngsters scored soon after but let us remember him
for the good times eh! The Old Gits were 1-0 down at half time and in
need of some inspiration.
Thankfully, a mix of even more
whisky and (in the great Fergie tradition!) a quick word with the
referee at half time and all was set fair for the second half.
Unfortunately, Shaun Cope had not read the script and after a quick
Christmas pantomime between Miller and White at the back left an
unguarded goal he could not resist looping a spectacular 25 yard volley
into the net. It was at this eleventh hour that Mark Gale finally
realised his proper role as referee and, having seen Rob White crumple
at the slightest touch in the penalty box, awarded the Old Gits their
first penalty. With the array of goal scoring talent at his mercy Rob
White had no hesitation in pointing to the man who, whilst not scoring
for three seasons for Bere Regis, just cannot miss for the Old
Gits….Darren Spivey! This confidence galvanised him into
slotting the
penalty away with some panache, only to find out in the bar afterwards
that Rob had only chosen him in the expectation that he would miss and
never, ever live it down! With friend like these…..! Never
mind, with
their gander up and the referee right behind them the Old Gits were
unstoppable. Another dodgy free kick out by the touchline gave Earl
Dacre the chance to whip a hanging ball in and who was there on the end
of it again, but Spivey. With the youngsters hugely demoralised now it
was only a matter of time before the winner came for the Old Gits. In
the last minute several Old Gits fell over in the penalty area and Mark
could take his pick as to which was most deserving of the resulting
penalty kick. Given what had gone before there could be only
one
penalty taker….Macca!
The
calmest man in the place he lined up the ball, took a
measured run up,
and toe punted the ball straight through the keeper and into the net.
The whistle blew, the crowd went wild, a beerfest of Charles Kennedy
proportions followed and, as nature’s anaesthetic calmly
washed away
the pain, the Old Gits wallowed in yet another famous victory. Better
luck next year youngsters…….
(NB There were no actual scenes of partial nudity or sexual refences,
but it did keep you reading till the very end!!)
Saturdays December 2005 - January 2006
Bere Regis 3: AFC Hurst 1Scorers: C Osmond, G Vincent, S Cope
Another
good month for Bere as they start to find their feet amongst
Dorset’s
elite. A comfortable (in the end!) win over Hurst saw perhaps the end
of an era, as Spivey was finally dropped from the team for the more
youthful new players (Adrian Moore!!). He was quite understanding,
though, and the increase in match fees that weekend was a mere
coincidence! The decision by the manager to keep faith with a winning
team was proved to be a right one as they kept up their winning ways
from the Cup, despite being a goal down thanks to a rare mistake from
Ginge (i.e. Spivey was not on the pitch to blame this time!). Ginge
made up for his mistake in the second half with a fine diving header,
Vinnie pinged a beauty in from the edge of the area to give Bere the
lead and then Shaun came off the subs bench to deliver the coup de
grace with an exquisite finish..
Bere Regis 2: AC Matravars 3
Scorers: W Cope, T Lumsden
The
first match after the Christmas break was a nice easy run-around
against the top of the league! Having said that, Bere were might
unlucky to lose this one. Wayne Cope gave Bere the lead with a glorious
curling effort from fully 30 yards that glided into the top corner.
Spivey, returning from his short winter break, showed us what we have
been missing with a clumsy challenge in the box that gave AC their
first penalty and with their only shot of the half they equalised. The
second half was, again, evenly matched and it was Bere who took the
lead again with an instinctive finish from Tony Lumsden in the six yard
box. As the seconds ticked away and the defence looked impregnable, Rob
was anxiously checking his pennies following his rash promise of beers
all round for a victory. Thankfully for him, with two minutes to go an
AC forward charged into the box and collapsed more easily than
Sven’s
loyalty to England. The fevered penalty appeals were met and, with
their second shot of the game, AC equalised. Worse was to follow as,
with thirty seconds to go, a corner was swung into the box and, in the
midst of a melee of flying limbs, the ball somehow trickled into the
net to give AC the win and Bere’s manager nightmares.
Bere Regis 1: Lyme Regis 0 (CUP – Quarter Finals)
Scorer: S Cope
For
Bere now, their one chance of silverware is in the Intermediate Cup. In
their first season in this prestigious competition Bere find themselves
as the last Division 2 team standing. Travelling to Bere Rec were Lyme
Regis, one of the favourites and finalists for five out of the last six
years. More of an underdog than a pygmy Chihuahua, Bere merely rolled
their sleeves up and gave it 200%, with startling results. Staunch
defending, ferocious tackling and the odd sprinkling of skill added up
to a recipe for victory. The muddy pitch and ferocious tackling did not
allow the normal feast of football, but at the end nobody from Bere
cared as the players carved out a place in the semi finals. The winning
goal was the only bright spot in the quagmire as an imperious pass from
Vinnie gave Shaun Cope his only run at goal and he finished ruthlessly.
There were some nervous moments in the dying seconds, but Messrs Moss,
Spivey and Osmond kept Lyme at bay and Bere, yet again, are in the hat
for Monday. Will they make the final? After this game, the jury are
still out……
Sundays December 2005 - January 2006
Hamworthy Labour 3: Bere Regis 3
Scorers: T Bennett (2); K Cox
Bere Regis 4: Hamworthy Labour 2
Scorers: S Cope (3); M Mahoney
AC Electrical 0: Bere Regis 3
Scorers: S Cope (2); M Mahoney
Bere
are on a roll! Unbeaten again this month, fifth in the league, scoring
goals for fun and even a clean sheet to finish off. Young manager of
the month, Adam Rogerson, was happy to keep his team’s feet
on the
ground, though, as his post match interviews were, in order,
‘Disappointing’; ‘Not enough
goals’; and ‘Crap’. God help them if they
lose!! This does not seem likely with Shaun Cope finding his shooting
boots, Mickey Mahoney bossing the midfield and Dean Rogerson tackling
like a peroxide tank! As the cream of Bere Regis continues to rise to
the top, Adam’s biggest challenge will be to keep this young
squad
together as the sharks of Man Utd, Arsenal and Purbeck Panthers start
to hover….
November and December 2005
Saturdays
Broadmayne 0: Bere Regis 0
Lytchett RT 5: Bere Regis 1 Scorer W Cope
Bere Regis 5: Verwood Town 3 aet (CUP) R White (2); C Osmond;
A Moore; W Cope
Bere's league form this month was disappointing, to say the
least. Both opposition
teams were big, tough and ugly, whilst Bere have more 'pretty boys'
than a house full of
budgies. On the small pitches Bere were simply muscled out of their
passing game and made
to look pretty ordinary. Even Bungy ended up with cracked ribs,
although still played
through it (clearly either very brave or very daft, you decide!).
Against Broadmayne,
Shaun Cope missed a golden opportunity and Dean saved us right at the
death. Against
Lytchett, up against players who would struggle to spell Neanderthal
and with nicknames
like Rhino, I have seen jellyfish with more backbone than most of the
Bere team.
Thankfully there is always the Cup….
Short on players, Rob decided to go short on the keeper as
well as he put Neal Percy in
to allow Dean to shore up the defence. Given that Verwood had disposed
of Lytchett RT in
the last round even the vicar wouldn't give them a prayer, but football
is a funny old
game! For the few hardy souls who turned up to watch they saw an
absolute classic. For the
diehard fans, there was the usual rant at the referee after the first
goal was clearly
offside. For the football lovers, there was a classic forty yarder from
Verwood to make it
2-0. For those who are interested in rarities, there was a goal from
Ginge (rarer than a
piece of Mourinho humility, or a game where he doesn't get injured).
For those with a weak
heart, there was the last minute goal from Rob White to send the game
into extra time. For
lovers of comedy, the sight of the referee picking up the ball and
threatening to go home
was a sheer delight (especially when he was asked to give us our ball
back please!) And
for those who like a happy ending, Rob White, Adrian Moore (nice lob,
or so I've heard!)
and Wayne Cope (a nicer lob than Adrian's) saw Bere home and dry and
into the quarter
finals.
A plum home draw against Lyme Regis, the darlings of the
Western league, should see a
capacity home crowd of at least ten again and swell the coffers to
allow Rob to dabble in
the transfer market. We may yet see another Vauxhall Chavalier in his
driveway……
Sundays
Bere Regis 3: Purbeck AFC 6 Scorers: K Cox; T Bennett; P
Macklin
Horse and Groom 1: Bere Regis 4 Scorers: N White (2); M
Mahoney; T Bennett
Bere Regis 2: Sturminster Marshall 3 Scorers M Walker; S Cope
It is good watching this young side turn themselves into quite
a formidable little
unit. Against the runaway, 'we cant stop scoring', 'we're too good for
this league',
leaders Bere were good enough to give them a fright, and I don't just
mean the sight of
Coxxy first thing on a Sunday morning. Bere were ahead and good for
their lead, but in the
end class told and Purbeck were so far ahead they even managed to bring
Whippet on for the
last ten minutes. He was soon showing us he had lost none of the old
touches with two
misplaced passes and three miscontrols in the space of a couple of
minutes. Legend! It is
nice to hear the manager say he was unhappy with a 4-1 win in the next
game, but then he
is a Man Utd supporter. Suffice to say that the team is ever improving
and almost pipped
Stur Marshall to a point and fifth place in the league the following
week. This team is
certainly going places, infact Hamworthy next week.
PS If anyone is interested in knowing more about Nick White's
goals and have a weekend
to spare then feel free to ask him yourself, or log onto his website
www.I'mthebest.com
for further information.
Saturdays - October
Bere Regis 6: Cranborne 1 (CUP) Scorers: W Cope (2), R White
(2), S Pettitt, o.g.
Despite the promotion, Bere continually find themselves
against familiar opposition and
these teams are about as familiar as they come. Bere's victory at
Cranborne was sweeter
than a sugar coated puppy given the spanking they got at this ground
last season. 'Rafa'
White never ceases to amaze us with his signings and he proved that he
is prepared to go
to the ends of the earth (or the Worlds End, as it is better known) to
scout out his
signings. If Thierry Henry ever works at the Oak then we have got it
made! Having said
that, Branners oozed class at the back allowing the rest of the team to
play their own
game and run rings around the opposition. Coxxy started the rout with a
drop of the
shoulder and an inch perfect pass for Wayne to slot in the corner. In
the second half,
Bere picked up the pace and Shaun Pettitt was, like the lonely farmer,
outstanding in his
field. His first goal was a scavenger's goal but his second was a thing
of beauty as he
struck a shot so pure it should have been sacrificed to the devil.
Despite Cranborne
pulling a consolation goal back, Shaun Cope came on and struck a free
kick that was too
much for a keeper sponsored by Teflon.
AC Matravars 3: Bere Regis 1 Scorer: W Cope
AC was disappointing, if only because Bere were 1-0 up and
coasting in the first 20
minutes, thanks to a class finish from Wayne from an immaculate Lumsden
through ball.
Undone by a similarly class finish and a missed offside, Bere were
unlucky to be losing at
half time. Minutes into the second half, Shaun was one on one with the
keeper yet missed
and that was it all bar the shouting, mostly at the referee! More
one-eyed than a Cyclops
he turned a well matched contest into a comedy. As Bere pressed for an
equaliser, there
was the amusing sight of a five on one break, with Ginge being the
hapless one. As both
Ginge and the keeper were drawn to the ball it was centred to their
forward and an open
goal. How he spooned it over must still give him nightmares, but the
£250 from 'You've
Been Framed' should help console him. AC wrapped the game up with a
scrambled goal from a
corner more hotly disputed than the 'X factor' results.
Cranborne 1: Bere Regis 4 Scorers: S Pettitt (2), S Cope, W
Cope
Cranborne must have been happy to join Bere in the second
round with a bye and then
unhappy to come to fortress Bere for a bye bye. Cranborne fielded a
weaker side than at
the beginning of the month but Bere were still in awesome form as they
steamrollered their
way to a 5-0 lead at half time. Wayne Cope was on top form as he
poached two early goals
and set up a tap in for the veteran Rob White to show that he had lost
none of his goal
hanging ability. It was unfortunate that Wayne suffered a twisted ankle
or he would surely
have plundered his hat trick. Rob White and Shaun Pettitt stepped in
where Wayne had let
off with a goal each and even Spivey chanced his luck. Rolling back the
years he showed us
his 'Cruyff' turn, swiftly followed by his 'Feeble' shot as the keeper
laid down and
waited for it to reach him. After this, the second half was a
disappointment, even the
sixth goal was an own goal! However, the sight of Bungy returning to
the fray was enough
to strike fear into the hearts of many, especially Ginge having to play
alongside him in
defence. They soon built up an understanding though, mainly with Bungy
understanding that
he should really play in midfield. Eventually, the referee finally blew
his whistle and
the players gleefully ran to the bar to watch England beat the Argies.
Sometimes, life is
good…..
Sundays - October
Bere Regis 2: Bryanston 1 Scorers: S Cope, T Bennett
Bere Regis 4: Windgreen 1 Scorers: P Macklin (2), S Cope, K
Cox
Broadstone Cons 3: Bere Regis 1 Scorer: T Bennett
Windgreen 0: Bere Regis 8 Scorers: S Cope (5), P Macklin (2),
M Walker
Now some of you long suffering readers may be pinching
themselves at this moment. I am
happy to report that this is not a dream or even a typo. Bere's Sunday
side have won three
out of their four games this month, Shaun Cope did score five goals in
one game and Peter
Crouch has played up front for England. Back to the good news though,
Adam appears to have
finally moulded his young charges into an effective unit. The most
impressive result was
the win against a strong Bryanston side that was thoroughly well
deserved. A good old
fashioned hammering of Windgreen in the Sunday sunshine is just what
the doctor ordered,
although just like any normal doctors we have been kept waiting a long
time for it.
However, my abiding memory is of Carl Dyke slicing the ball past his
own keeper and then
laughing his head off. It reminds me what Sunday football is all about
and may be why this
team will go from strength to strength.
Saturdays - October
Bere Regis 6: Cranborne 1 (CUP) Scorers: W Cope (2), R White
(2), S Pettitt, o.g.
Despite the promotion, Bere continually find themselves
against familiar opposition and
these teams are about as familiar as they come. Bere's victory at
Cranborne was sweeter
than a sugar coated puppy given the spanking they got at this ground
last season. 'Rafa'
White never ceases to amaze us with his signings and he proved that he
is prepared to go
to the ends of the earth (or the Worlds End, as it is better known) to
scout out his
signings. If Thierry Henry ever works at the Oak then we have got it
made! Having said
that, Branners oozed class at the back allowing the rest of the team to
play their own
game and run rings around the opposition. Coxxy started the rout with a
drop of the
shoulder and an inch perfect pass for Wayne to slot in the corner. In
the second half,
Bere picked up the pace and Shaun Pettitt was, like the lonely farmer,
outstanding in his
field. His first goal was a scavenger's goal but his second was a thing
of beauty as he
struck a shot so pure it should have been sacrificed to the devil.
Despite Cranborne
pulling a consolation goal back, Shaun Cope came on and struck a free
kick that was too
much for a keeper sponsored by Teflon.
AC Matravars 3: Bere Regis 1 Scorer: W Cope
AC was disappointing, if only because Bere were 1-0 up and
coasting in the first 20
minutes, thanks to a class finish from Wayne from an immaculate Lumsden
through ball.
Undone by a similarly class finish and a missed offside, Bere were
unlucky to be losing at
half time. Minutes into the second half, Shaun was one on one with the
keeper yet missed
and that was it all bar the shouting, mostly at the referee! More
one-eyed than a Cyclops
he turned a well matched contest into a comedy. As Bere pressed for an
equaliser, there
was the amusing sight of a five on one break, with Ginge being the
hapless one. As both
Ginge and the keeper were drawn to the ball it was centred to their
forward and an open
goal. How he spooned it over must still give him nightmares, but the
£250 from 'You've
Been Framed' should help console him. AC wrapped the game up with a
scrambled goal from a
corner more hotly disputed than the 'X factor' results.
Cranborne 1: Bere Regis 4 Scorers: S Pettitt (2), S Cope, W
Cope
Cranborne must have been happy to join Bere in the second
round with a bye and then
unhappy to come to fortress Bere for a bye bye. Cranborne fielded a
weaker side than at
the beginning of the month but Bere were still in awesome form as they
steamrollered their
way to a 5-0 lead at half time. Wayne Cope was on top form as he
poached two early goals
and set up a tap in for the veteran Rob White to show that he had lost
none of his goal
hanging ability. It was unfortunate that Wayne suffered a twisted ankle
or he would surely
have plundered his hat trick. Rob White and Shaun Pettitt stepped in
where Wayne had let
off with a goal each and even Spivey chanced his luck. Rolling back the
years he showed us
his 'Cruyff' turn, swiftly followed by his 'Feeble' shot as the keeper
laid down and
waited for it to reach him. After this, the second half was a
disappointment, even the
sixth goal was an own goal! However, the sight of Bungy returning to
the fray was enough
to strike fear into the hearts of many, especially Ginge having to play
alongside him in
defence. They soon built up an understanding though, mainly with Bungy
understanding that
he should really play in midfield. Eventually, the referee finally blew
his whistle and
the players gleefully ran to the bar to watch England beat the Argies.
Sometimes, life is
good…..
Sundays - October
Bere Regis 2: Bryanston 1 Scorers: S Cope, T Bennett
Bere Regis 4: Windgreen 1 Scorers: P Macklin (2), S Cope, K
Cox
Broadstone Cons 3: Bere Regis 1 Scorer: T Bennett
Windgreen 0: Bere Regis 8 Scorers: S Cope (5), P Macklin (2),
M Walker
Now some of you long suffering readers may be pinching
themselves at this moment. I am
happy to report that this is not a dream or even a typo. Bere's Sunday
side have won three
out of their four games this month, Shaun Cope did score five goals in
one game and Peter
Crouch has played up front for England. Back to the good news though,
Adam appears to have
finally moulded his young charges into an effective unit. The most
impressive result was
the win against a strong Bryanston side that was thoroughly well
deserved. A good old
fashioned hammering of Windgreen in the Sunday sunshine is just what
the doctor ordered,
although just like any normal doctors we have been kept waiting a long
time for it.
However, my abiding memory is of Carl Dyke slicing the ball past his
own keeper and then
laughing his head off. It reminds me what Sunday football is all about
and may be why this
team will go from strength to strength.
Saturdays
Bere Regis 3: Wareham Rangers 2
Scorers: S Cope (2); T Lumsden
At least Bere now know that they can compete in Division 2
with one win and two draws
in the month and a manager looking at missed chances rather than lucky
escapes. The
victory was achieved with the help of two finishes cooler than a
cucumber in the Arctic
from Shaun in the first half. Just when Wareham had clawed their way
back in to the game
thanks to a dodgy penalty decision, Lumsden broke their hearts with a
finish smarter than
an owl at a wedding.
Easton United 1: Bere Regis 1
Scorer: S Pettit
Against both Portland teams Bere could not have been more
dominant if they had been
wearing leather and cracking whips, yet both times they had to rely on
late equalisers
from Sean 'Pretty Boy' Pettit. Away to Portland 'Rafa' White was
parading his new signing
Chris Osmond, a defender in the Woodgate mould. This was soon
demonstrated as his terrible
mistake let Easton in for an easy goal (Darren Spivey was in no way
implicated in this
goal and has several witnesses, all close family, who can attest to
this). Emulating his
hero, Chris (Ginge to his mates, if he has any left after this!) was
then sent off for a
second bookable offence and demonstrated the petulance of Rooney as he
blasted the ball
off into the distance. This boy has everything! Thankfully, Sean Pettit
showed a bit of
Rooney class with a volley that had goal written on it from the moment
it left his foot.
Bere Regis 1: Wyke Rovers 1
Scorer: S Pettit
The Wyke game showed Bere's strength in depth…non
existent! Despite a glut of
players signed on, 'Rafa' was still seen on the day of the game at
junior football
training searching for parents who may want a game. Thankfully, Adrian
Moorinho and Andy
Curtis were persuaded to sign on and Jason Muscato was persuaded not
to. Bere certainly
looked like a scratch team in the first half and couldn't even pass
muster let alone the
ball, despite a beautiful new kit courtesy of 'Hot Shots' paintball
(available for all
good parties and events). Only 1-0 down at half time they threw caution
to the wind in the
second half and for 44 minutes did everything but score against a
keeper who was simply
inspired. I won't dwell on the open goal that Adrian Moore missed, I
personally feel he
did well to get to it. I will, however, dwell on that man Sean Pettit
again as, in a
penalty area with more limbs than a game of octopus Twister, he calmly
found space and
rifled home.
The signs are there for Rafa, but can he read
them…….
Sundays
Bere Regis 0: Wallisdown Sports 9
Morden 1: Bere Regis 6
Scorers: N Percy, S Pettit, M Mahoney, S Cope, T Bennett (2)
The one bright spot in an otherwise very dark month was the
hammering of a very
ordinary Morden. The return of Johnny Cleall to Sunday football seemed
to galvanise the
team and he certainly made a difference, giving away the penalty that
led to Morden's
opening goal and giving them a 1-0 lead. Thankfully, the rest of the
team were in
sparkling form, Texas Tom especially as he demonstrated why he is the
best shot in the
West.
Bere Regis 1: Dumpton Academicals 4 Scorer: T Bennett
Bere Regis 0: Ship Inn 7 (Cup)
However, the other games in the month demonstrated that once
this team lose a couple of
goals and heads go down then Margaret Thatcher has more chance of
making a comeback than
they do. Out of the cup in a game that saw the Big Gay Bear have a mare
of Red Rum
proportions and seriously lagging in the league the team now seem to be
already playing
for survival.
I can see that the manager will have to be more Moyes than
Mourinho this year…..
Saturdays
Bere Regis 0: Purbeck Panthers 4
A new league, a new manager and Bere had a rude awakening! As
Sven Goran White surveyed
the wreckage of the second half his mind probably drifted back to the
better days of
pre-season.
The pre-season tour to Weston proved lucrative, for the bars
at Weston at least! After
a late evening/early morning warm-up on the Friday night scaling walls
and running from
burly bouncers in their attempts to view the 1500 netball players at
Pontins, the team was
match fit for the next day. An impromptu kick about on the seafront
against the locals
gave Sven his first chance to tinker with his team. A 12-10 win gave
him his much sought
after first victory, but changes needed to be made. Wayne's four goals
assured his place,
but a defence leakier than a rusty colander needed some urgent surgery.
Paddles was
dropped in goal as his back finally seized up; Gary Lewis looks more
like a cup player,
must be the ears; Stomper's reputation as a speed merchant was found
out to be only in
dating; and Pricey once again came up short when it mattered. Sven was
heard to mutter 'I
think the diamond worked well, but then my Dad has always been a hard
worker'.
For the friendlies, Sven was off talent spotting in Spain and
the job was left to Tord
Spiv. A relatively easy 4-1 win against Milborne was followed by a
disastrous loss to the
YMCA as the team kept the construction worker well marked, but allowed
the Indian and the
cop to run riot. It certainly did not help that the manager was forced
to drive around the
village looking for players before the match; even Henry the Eighth had
more commitment
than some of these players!! The next friendly and the first match had
to be cancelled due
to a distinct lack of interest, but Sven was soon back working his
magic and a team was
duly presented for this match against one of the favourites for the
title.
Some old faces had returned, like Robbie Blake after starring
in a heated contest
against the fire brigade, and Chris Oram whose heart has always been
Bere, as has his
stomach. Gareth Vincent was a veritable coup for the manager as he was
plucked from
beneath the noses of a combination side. Even Bungy was making an
appearance, since he had
heard the manager was looking for new faces and he was wondering
whether he could have one
too.
Despite not having played together before, the first half was
a remarkably good
performance and Bere were unlucky to be 1-0 down at the interval. After
weathering a storm
in the first twenty minutes thanks largely to the windbreak that is
Spivey, Bere
eventually found their passing range and could easily have been three
to the good. Vinny
and Oram started to find their passing range and Neal 'Roadrunner'
Percy's blistering pace
was far too much for the full back. Shaun, Wayne and Vinny have
certainly had better
finishing days than this!
The second half was about as pretty to watch as Quasimodo's
love child. Were it not for
Dean Rogerson in goal, Purbeck would have won by a cricket score as
their superior fitness
came to the fore. The final whistle was a blessing!!
Sven has much to think about for the season
ahead……..
Sundays
Sturminster Marshall 5: Bere Regis 1
Full marks to the manager in getting a team together from a
squad more apathetic than a
teenage sloth. A heavy defeat, but a goal from Texas Tom and a few
chances may yet mean
that all is not lost…except for this game.
